I don’t get how babies can cry at restaurants lol like nigga why you cryin there’s food around you rejoice
GIRLS DONT READ this ones just for the fellas. only guys will get this one. bros you know when youre at the gym workin on your ‘toids to get big for the sports well OKAY I’m sure the ladies have stopped reading by now, so what’s their deal? how do I tell the girls I love them without having to talk? I’m scared
THE WORST THING IN THE WORLD IS WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS U CHIPS AND U REACH IN THE BAG BUT U CAN’T GET A HOLD OF A CHIP AND U START SWEATIN’ AND PEOPLE ARE STARING CUZ U CAN’T GET HOLD OF A GODDAMN CHIP AND THEN CHILDREN ARE SCREAMING AND U HEAR GUNSHOTS AND BUILDINGS START COLLAPSING BUT U STILL. CAN’T. GET. A. CHIP.
also I’m not saying I keep track of who reblogs my selfies but there is a mental list of who will have power when I conquer
We both wear the pants in this relationship. One leg each, we waddle around in unison. It’s beautiful, in a way.
lms if u dtf
little do the people liking this realize ‘dtf’ stands for ‘dont tolerate furries’ youve all made a commitment to destroying the furry agenda and theres no backing out. welcome to the revolution
my kitty fell asleep on me so i said “are you sleeping” and she meowed really quietly it was the cutest thing ever im gonna die